I’m waiting in the garden.
For what? For who? For when? For where?
I don’t know.
Like Waiting for Godot.
I’m beginning to see
Not what I’m waiting for,
But how I wait.
I wait with more presence,
I’m more here here.
I wait without expectation,
But I’m not disappointed.
When I’m not waiting I feel edgy;
I have to find something to do with myself.
By when I’m waiting, I have purpose,
And intent, and focus.
Wait with me won’t you ?
And we’ll see what turns up.
-Small town boy
Neil Young’s heart of gold
Sings to my lonely heart.
The. Heart that has loved too many
And not enough.
I have a strong heart. And I believe it
When it says it is in love.
I believe it when it yearns for another’s touch,
Another’s kiss.
My heart is no fool.
My heart is not a foolish heart.
When my heart feels the love,
I pay attention.
My body fills with a seizure of the
Blood and gut.
My brain looses all rational thought.
My spirit soars to the heavens
Thanking God for another go
At love Devine and corporal.
My friend died waiting for someone to love.
I have many who love me.
Maybe it’s the passion that I miss.
The rush.
The excitement.
My whole self yearns for
Touch and kiss.
Waiting.
Hopeful.
Remembering when.
Remembering who.
Wanting more.
The song they played at his funeral, his song?
“I need someone to love me.” By Queen
I know he is where love abounds, now.
I know he’s found someone to love him.
I loved him.
– Small town boy
If it don’t work, make it work
is a saying that does not work with people.
Waiting with kindness allows conversation
wherin you learn that you are starting
a long process
of waiting, listening, hearing and understanding
befor you procede.
In fact, it will surprise you with the result.
Just what you were trying to dig out,
just when you didn’t know how to procede,
just when you ran out of options,
Response arrives carrying the answers you wanted
and more.
Now by listening and not be thinking of what I want to do next,
I hear. When I hear I can see to discern meaning.
When I discern meaning, I can move ahead, slowly.
It will ultimately be done by me on an appropriate timeline,
Not of my choosing,
but of my discerning.
I’m waiting for the next shoe to drop.
Small town boy
On occasion the planets align
and things go right in the world.
While I am working on patience and waiting
The gods pull off the impossible
right beneath my nose
right into my benefit basket.
The more I try to be calm and open
the more good things come.
Not good things in the usual sense,
but good things none the less.
I couldn’t have planned it this way, honestly
but it worked itself out in a mutually beneficial
and honest way making our best selves
rise to the top and connecting.
While I had no idea how to resolve
confusion and misunderstanding,
my dear ones had it in them all along,
adding to my humility and love.
Love is more powerful than you can know,
and when its forces align
love abounds, heals, communicates,interacts,
and brings out the best in us.
I am here to love you.
I am here to love you.
Sometimes that means sitting quietly.
– Small town boy
As I sit in the morning, watching outside, I see the
frost; I see rooves frozen white,
i’m thinking that I’m waiting for the next big hit, a jolt of passion.
It’s not like it hasn’t happened before, nor
Like i’m innured to the feeling of it.
It’s more like it’s waiting for me to do something?
What is it waiting for me to do? A kindness? A generosity? thoughtful prayer?
I’ve plenty of those, but which to choose. The one on the right,
or the one on the left? The red one or the blue one?
Does it matter if I’ve used it before? Can I use it again, or
must i create a new thing to do? Something I’ve hidden deep
inside to keep only for myself, privately?
A junco feeds on the patio, hopping and pecking for morning brunch,
I see it out my sliding glass doors in the cold, pecking at the concrete.
It must be looking to, but not waiting for it to come to her.
I best get hopping, pecking, moving on with my life,
so that I can find it too.
Waiting for Burning Man tickets
Hoping I won’t be in the thickets
My cousin says be ready
My friend says don’t be fretty
The whole process is full of sticky wickets
My mouse trembles with a shaky finger
Can’t wait, no time left to linger
If I’m gonna miss out
Too late for me to pout
I’ll just have to hide my talent as a singer
*#5
lloydmcanelly 